The Blog of Amber

I'm sure no one checks this anymore.

I haven't updated this in a while. Life has been pretty good since then. Got married...went on an awesome cruise..Ryan got a new job..I'm getting a new job..Ryan got a new vehicle..My car is paid off..I started school again.. I guess my boring life is actually not so boring.

The past two months have been kind of tiring. I go to work, I come home and do schoolwork, continue that for 4 more days, then it's the weekend, where I do more schoolwork. Going to school online is great, but I wouldn't say it's any easier. Things should get better soon. My new job at the hospital will  be less hours, which sucks for my bank account, but will be great for my sanity. It will all work out though. And Spring Break is next week!!

Being married is good. Actually, it's the same as before, except now I have health insurance and I get to say "My husband..." It is still weird to hear myself say that but I suppose I'll get used to it by our one year anniversary. We are dying to go on another cruise, which was pretty much the most fun we've ever had. We are much in need of another vacation.

Talk to ya later.

It's getting close!

The wedding is only six weeks away. It's hard to believe I'm going to be married. It's gonna be so weiiiird. I feel like such an old lady. Only sad part is that I won't be able to use the word "fiance" anymore. "Husband" is an ugly word. :/

I'm trying to get everything done. I'm picking out flowers this weekend and getting engagement photos done then going up to our cabin to plan things out. Next weekend we will be meeting with our minister to talk about the ceremony. Still need to plan out the cake, alterations, and food and I think we are good to go...for the most part.

My body doesn't like me at the moment. I've been going to the gym alot lately and must have pulled a muscle in my back. The pain has been traveling all throughout my back for the past week. I hope all this working out will pay off eventually!!

 

 

Happy 4th!

The year is halfway over, where did the time go? It has been a pretty good year so far and the best is yet to come!

This Fourth of July weekend was spent at the Outdoors Inn Campground, which has become a yearly tradition. The usual gang was all there. It was nice to do something different and get away for the weekend (although I didn't mind coming back to the house for a bit to take a shower and cool off). Although the days were hot, I was freezing at night!! Ryan and I have been discussing getting a popup camper in a couple of years which is something I'm looking forward to.

After the campground, we went to my parents house for a crazy and loud day. Trisha and Brian were in town as well and Danielles mom so it was definitely a crowded house. There were babies everywhere and kids at every corner. It's nice to see how much our family has grown..holidays were pretty boring with just the 6 of us. :) It was also nice to go home to some peace and quiet that night. But it was a fun day, I love the craziness.

In two more months, I'll be a married woman! I was getting a little nervous for a while..mostly because I felt too young to be married. I'm feeling better now though, I'm excited to be Mrs. Amber Greb-Walsh. hehehe Don't tell Ryan I'm keeping my last name!

Good Times

Life has never been so perfect as it is right now. I'm making good money working 40 hours a week which has been my goal for so long. I've got new carpet which means the house is pretty much completed (minus a few things here and there). I'm getting married in two and a half months and going on an awesome cruise with the love of my life. And I'm going on vacation to Rhode Island soon! I'd say things are going pretty good.

Ryan and I have been following this app on our phone called C25K or Couch to 5 kilometers. It's a program that gets us jogging for 30 minutes straight at the end of nine weeks. We are on week 7 right now..although we've been doing it for 8 or 9 weeks..we had a rough start. We used to walk from our house and run on the greenway but then summer arrived and it became way too hot to do this. I decided to get a gym membership and what a relief. Now I can run while watching TV with a fan blowing on me and water in a cupholder. So much better. Although I don't mind going to the gym, it will be nice to run outside again when fall comes.

Everything for the wedding seems to be under control. Only big things left to figure out is the flowers, cake and Ryans suit. We need to meet with our officiate soon so find out what's going on and also need to take some engagement photos. So over this wedding, I just want the cruise!!

My Smokey is gone.

I don't think I've ever been so sad before. I didn't know how attached I was to him until the last few days he was here. Now the house seems so empty and I feel so alone. When I try to get my mind off of him to stop the crying, I find something that reminds me of him..the empty spot where his bed used to be..his nasty old toys in the garbage..even the digusting pee smell that lingers on carpet makes me miss him. I'm sad because I miss him but I'm also worried about him and just want him to be happy and comfortable whereever he ends up. I feel guilty for giving up on him and feel like I failed at his mommy. I wonder if we made a mistake giving him back, but I don't believe anything would get him to like Ryan and a dog who doesn't like Ryan just won't work for us.

I just can't believe that I'll never get to see him again. :(

Making plans...

My time with Smokey is ticking away. I am rather depressed about it but am trying not to be. Not having to take care of him will be a relief but I will miss him very much. I feel guilty and am worried about his feelings but then I remember he's a dog and probably won't remember me after a couple days. I hope he forgets about me which is sad because I will always remember him. Why are dog relationships so difficult? Why does he have to be so dang cute? The plan is for Jason and Danielle to take him back to Florida and meet up with their previous owners. I hope it works out because that will save us alot of money in gas. Luckily it will be on my day off so I will have all day to cry over it.

 

On a happier note, I believe Ryan and I have changed out honeymoon plans. We can never decide on anything so when we actually do make a decision, it's amazing! The more I have been researching cruises the more excited I am about it. We were always kind of iffy about Chicago but I'm feeling good about taking a nice relaxing cruise. I'm hoping to book it soon!

Doggy problems

After long talks and alot of tears, Ryan and I have decided we can no longer take care of our Smokey. He is still very afraid of Ryan, who has not been able to pick him up and can barely even pet him. We've tried all we can think of to get Smokey to be comfortable with Ryan but there just seems to be no hope. We are trying to work out a way to return him to his previous owners so in the meantime I will be loving him all that I can before he leaves.

After these past three months with Smokey, I have come to realize I am not meant to be a dog owner. It takes alot of time and effort and patience and all I get in return is pee and poo and a little bit of love. I just can't handle the cleaning up after this crazy monster. It will be a long time before Ryan and I go through this process again. A very long time...

 

Changes

Today Ryan and I took a ride up to our wedding venue, Cherokee Mountain Cabins. We have been discussing making some changes to the wedding so we got everything finalized today. We have changed the date from October to September 1o. Although there will not be the beautiful fall foliage, it will be warmer, which is important since the ceremony will take place outside. It will also be warmer for our trip to Chicago! The day also hold some sentimental value for us so I think the change is good. I'm a little worried that it will be too soon to have a fall theme wedding but we shall see.

We had also been talking about changing the wedding to take place at one of the cabins instead of "the lodge". So the lady from the cabin place, Donna, took us to look at three different cabins. There were two three-bedroom cabins that were right on the creek which both had nice decks which were perfect for a small ceremony. She also took us up to the top of the mountain to see the "Sanctuary". It was huge and beautiful and I loved it but it was more expensive and I really liked the idea of getting married by the creek so we chose one of the three-bedroom cabins.

So we will be getting married at the Slippery Rock Cabin on 9-10-11. We are very excited about our non-traditional wedding, I think it will be alot of fun (there's a pool table and a wet bar also!).

     

Decisions

Having a dog makes me realize how nice it was to not have a dog. It's alot of work! I'm sure it would be all worth it if we had a normal dog..but Smokey is not your normal dog. He's a freak! He has made alot of improvement but he's still not quite there. We are giving him til the end of April to act like the dog of our dreams... If he's still scared to death of Ryan, then he's not going to work out. On one hand, I am hoping that it all works out because he's so dang cute. On the other hand, I am hoping it won't work out because I'm sick of cleaning up after him!

I haven't even thought about the wedding in about a month..I should probably start planning again, I've just been too distracted with this dog. We've decided to go with a small intimate wedding with just our close family there. I am very happy about this, I wasn't really looking forward to having strangers at my wedding. Will I regret not having a bigger wedding? Probably not..seems like a waste of money. I believe our day will be even more special and a fraction of the cost. We've also decided on our honeymoon..at least we are pretty certain.. We will be going to Chicago! I am very excited!

I really want to decide on a career. I'm juggling around two options in my head but am not certain about either of them. I feel as though I'm wasting time. However, I want to make sure I am happy and commited to my decision. And that takes time...

 

"When your values are clear to you, making decisions becomes easier."

-Roy Disney

Smokey!!!!

We have a dog! He is not exactly our dream dog at the moment but he's getting there. Smokey and I did not start out on the right foot, a few bites was enough to make me hate him. He would jump at every single movement and mostly just sat there shivering. He's getting better though. He has become attached to me and follows me around the house. On the other hand, he is still pretty scared of Ryan. This makes Ryan sad, I feel so bad but we don't know what to do about it. He seems to be getting better every day so I guess only time will tell. I am hoping he will not be so jumpy and will be playful and sweet and loving. I really want to be able to take him places with me but it seems impossible right now. We shall see though!